Activate: Babysitter Mode
by Punzie the Platypus
Summary: Post-The Incredibles 2. Bob and Helen take Edna up on her offer to babysit Jack-Jack again—throwing in Violet and Dash as a surprise. Edna is all for leaving them by themselves all weekend so she can have Jack-Jack all to herself, but eventually (with the help of aggressive pep talks and sugary cereal) draws them into an itinerary all four of them enjoy.


_**Soli Deo gloria**_

 **DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own The Incredibles.**

 **You know one of my favorite parts of The Incredibles 2 was Edna babysitting Jack-Jack. It was the friendship we didn't deserve, but what we needed right now. So, more babysitting!**

Edna's eye went straight past Bob and Helen. "Where is he?! Where is my boy?!" Her round eyes and glasses filled the entire computer screen, trying in vain to search past the Parr parents in the front seats of their car for their baby.

Bob laughed. "He's right here, E. He's just in his car seat."

"Okay, fine, fine. Just hurry up and drive. I _need_ to see him!" Edna waved them through as her electronic security gate opened. Her screen went black.

Bob let their family van cruise up the winding hill to Edna's modern house. "She seemed . . . enthusiastic," Helen said, a little suspiciously.

"Hey, she had a great time babysitting him last time. She seems to really be looking forward to it," Bob said.

Jack-Jack cooed as he burst into flames, happily clapping in excitement. He knew _exactly_ who he was going to see. Dash extinguished his brother with a poof of white foam before leaning into the front seat. "Um, does Aunt E know that Vi and I are coming, too?" he wondered.

"Yeah." Violet leaned into the front as well, sandwiching Jack-Jack and his foam between her and Dash. "It's not like I need a babysitter anymore or anything—"

"Violet, we've gone over this—" Helen said.

"Does Aunt E have cool inventions and remotes and stuff at her house?" Dash asked his dad, curious.

"Sure she does—" Bob was interrupted by Helen. "Bob, you did tell her that she was going to babysit Violet and Dash as well, right?"

"Um, I'm sure I did," Bob said in a voice that told Helen he wasn't exactly sure at all.

"Bob—!"

"I don't _need_ a babysitter—!" Violet protested.

This entire time Dash had been talking loudly to himself—some spiel about exploring all the secret rooms of her crazy cool lab/house and trying out all the futuristic gadgets that all looked like they were out of spy cartoons. The car was loud and full of voices overlapping each other; Jack-Jack's cooing increased as they came to a stop in front of the huge floor-length glass windows. Jack-Jack then phased through his car seat, through his brother, through the car, into the waiting arms of a jumpy Edna. "Ah! Jack-Jack, my boy, you are finally _here_!" She touched noses to him; he giggled, excited to be back with his Edna. He morphed his face to mirror hers. This touched her (as it always did) and she said, holding him on her tiny short hip, "This _dahling_ boy is growing more and more _dahling_ every time I see him!"

"I'm glad you think so," Bob said, exiting the car (the car visibly tilted up and down like a scale as he left it).

"Hi E," Helen said, coming around.

"Helen! Dear! It's been too long, dahling, _much_ too long. Our next visit will be longer, over tea and biscuits. I've some great imports from overseas on that account." Edna's face changed as Violet and Dash appeared. "Oh. You brought the older ones. Here to see their little brother off? Well, if we _must_ make the goodbyes dramatic!" Edna's face lit up as Jack-Jack, of his own accord, raised his chubby paw and waved at his siblings. "Ah! He _waves_. This boy positively _reeks_ of talent!" She once again touched noses with an ecstatic Jack-Jack.

"Um, E. . ." Bob started.

Edna looked up to see knapsacks and duffel bags around Violet and Dash. "That is an awful lot of luggage for just one baby, Robert, _especially_ since I was planning on designing him an entirely new wardrobe this weekend." Her eyes narrowed. "What does this mean, Robert?"

Bob opened his mouth to reply, but Dash, as usual, was quicker. "We're staying for the weekend, too!" And before Edna could say anything, Dash disappeared at top speed into the house, luggage and all.

Before Edna could find her voice (it was just a feat to be able to take it away from her in the first place), Violet walked to her. She wore a duffel bag strap on her shoulder and her purse. "Thanks for having us over, Aunt E. Just so you know," here she donned a secretive whisper and put her hand to her mouth, "I don't need any babysitting. I will to use the phone, though. A boy's supposed to call me this weekend."

'Aunt E' stood there in shock as Violet too passed by her into the house. Her face grew beet red as she said in a stern voice, "Robert, have you lost the ability to communicate important details? As I recall, when I told you I insisted on babysitting Jack-Jack again, there was a noticeable lack of mention of school-age children and teenagers." Her tiny foot tapped against the pavement. Jack-Jack's face spoke of worry; he knew his E wasn't very happy.

Bob raised his hands apologetically. "I'm sorry, E. I must've forgotten to mention it."

Helen decided to step in before E blew a gasket. "We really _do_ appreciate it, E. We've got this big conference with Winston Deavor and Frozone. It's a big favor that we _totally_ owe you for."

Edna regarded both of them with hooded eyes. "There are a _lot_ of favors you owe me for." She sighed but straightened her small stature. "This is surely a wrench in the works, but as I used to say at fashion shows, the show _must_ go on. And so it shall," here she looked sharply at Bob, "no thanks to you."

Bob pointed finger guns at her. "You're the best, E."

Edna rolled her eyes as she waved them away, dismissing them. "I know, I know. Really, I'm a doormat, the way I let you all walk all over me. Whatever. Enjoy your weekend. I will make sure all _three_ of your brood survive."

"That's really _all_ we care about," Bob said, reentering the car.

"Really: we don't care about them having fun or a good time just as long as they're okay," Helen said. She kissed Jack-Jack's head and squeezed Edna's hand. "Thanks, E."

"Yes, yes, I know. Go before I change my mind!" Edna said. She sniffed as their car disappeared down her winding driveway. "Really," she said to Jack-Jack, "I used to be _revered_ , respected; I used to make men tremble in their shoes. Now I am put on the shelf, set aside. Now I am the aunt who takes the kids on the weekend."

Jack-Jack gurgled. Edna said, smiling, "Oh no, not _you_ , dear! You and I are of one mind; we are one _being_. Buttttt," she said, walking into the house, "your brother and sister are very much two different creatures, creatures I am not as familiar with. I have high hopes, though," she said, despite her dry tone saying that she did _not_ , "that this weekend we can find some kind of common ground. If not, I fear for my house. Anarchy is hell on ottomans and imported carpets."

Upon entering her kitchen, Edna swiveled her head around. "Now, just where have those hooligans put themselves?" She tsked and shook her head as Jack-Jack phased out of her arms and cooed as he casually disappeared in and out through the walls. "Any sign of them?" she asked the floating baby as he passed overhead, upside down. He just cooed.

"Computer," Edna said, waving a finger, "locate the other two heat signatures in the house. Do _not_ bring any harm to them, though; just tell me of their locations."

The computer did so; in the little device Edna pulled from her pocket, two red spots beeped on the electronic 3D sketch of her house. She frowned. "The good guest room _and_ the second best guest room. I wonder who won out." She clapped her hands. "Follow me upstairs, Jack-Jack."

Edna took the short steps in her long strides, entering the open modern layout of her second floor. She knocked on the guest room door (only her top-secret lab and front and back doors carried her elaborate, up-to-date security system; guests, unfortunately, had to be able to go in and out of doors without fear of a giant laser being beamed onto them); inside, she could hear Jack-Jack's giggles. "Who is in there?" she said.

The door blew open; a gust of wind swept past her. She didn't see a thing, even as she brushed her disheveled bangs from her eyes; all she could see was Jack-Jack on the floor with his brother Dash, who had the gall to innocently waved at her. "Hi Aunt E," he said. He stretched his arms out. "Your house is _INSANE_! I don't ever want to leave!"

As Edna finished fixing her perfect hair, she muttered, "That opinion can easily be changed." She inhaled and said, walking into the room on her quick feet, "Dashiell, this weekend I had made different plans, not anticipating the arrival of you and your sister. I am open to suggestions for—"

"Ohhh! Tomorrow's Saturday morning, and you know what that means!" Dash said, dashing to his feet.

Edna looked confused. "I am going to assume the obvious and that's that it'll be Saturday morning," she said drily.

"Nooo!" Dash screamed. "It means Saturday morning cartoons and no school and tons of sugary cereal!"

"We are in an unfortunate famine of sugary cereal at the moment," Edna said. "I follow a strictly adhered-to health regimen of organic, unprocessed produce, grains, and fish."

Dash pointed at Jack-Jack, who had been not-very-covertly snuck a large pink swirly lollipop by Edna. "Then why do you keep _those_ on-hand?!"

"For such occasions as arise as call for it," Edna snapped. "Perhaps if I had been informed ahead of time instead of being _surprised_ by your visit, I would've made plans accordingly."

"Okay, maybe not the sugary cereal, but cartoons!" Dash said, whooping again.

"Oh, no whooping, my house and I don't do whooping," Edna said. She waved a hand at him. "As long as you don't spend all your time breaking pieces of my house from boredom or whatever it is that children do when they are bored, I don't care." She shook her head as she took up Jack-Jack and said, "I'll make sure you get fed properly, but otherwise, I leave you to your own care. I assume your parents have a set curfew for you and you know how to brush your own teeth and stuff like that?"

Dash cocked his head. "You don't know much about children, do you?"

Again, Edna waved a hand at him. "I never raised any children! I know they can do _some_ things, but I don't know what age they start learning things!"

Dash just continued giving her this look as she closed the door. To Jack-Jack, "So, we've established the location of your brother. Now, once we know where your sister is, we'll—"

Edna and Jack-Jack heard a loud annoyed scream coming from the room across Dash's. Edna shared a look with Jack-Jack. "Your sister, I assume?" she asked drily.

Jack-Jack giggled. "Yeah!" and lavishly licked his lollipop.

Edna sighed and knocked on the door. "Hello, Violet? It's Aunt E and Jack-Jack. We've come to establish a routine for this weekend."

Edna received no answer, so she cracked the door open. It opened to a nicely made bedroom with big windows, but other than the violet-colored duffel bag and purse, there was no indication that there was a teenage girl in here. Which meant that there was an invisible teenage girl in here.

Edna whispered instructions into Jack-Jack's ear. He cooed and responded. He phased gently through the furniture until he landed on a high shelf. Talking to himself, he crawled along the shelf until he fell off. Instead of falling on his head, however, he was caught in midair. Anyone could see the invisible arms cradling their baby brother.

"Ha! She reveals herself!" Edna accused. She pointed a finger at the sagging figure as she quickened over to take Jack-Jack from her arms. "Why do you mean by hiding in this room all by yourself? Surely your parents have taught you common courtesy such as answering someone when they ask for you!"

Violet became visibly, defeated. "I just want to be left alone, Aunt E," she groaned, dragging herself across the neatly made bed to the headboard. She gathered a pillow to herself, her eyes settling anxiously on the phone sitting patiently, innocent and inanimate, on her nightstand.

"Is that your plan for the whole weekend? If so, we can work that into our own plans quite easily," Edna said, talking to Jack-Jack as much as Violet. She did notice, however, the stare Violet affixed on that phone, and couldn't help saying, "Are you expecting a call from a certain someone? Perhaps a certain boy?"

Violet didn't even deny it. Pink just rose in her cheeks as she said, muffled against the pillow, "Maybe."

Edna scoffed. "That's all your plans for the _whole_ weekend? Staring at the telephone until your crush decides to call you? Wait a minute." A sudden thought came to Edna. She stomped over to Violet's side. "Did you give this _boy_ the phone number to this address?!"

"Well, _yeah_ ," Violet said. "He said he'd call me this weekend, and obviously he couldn't use our house phone. I'd, like, never answer."

"No, no, it's fine, just _fine_ ," Edna said, scoffing as she turned to the door, waving a hand at Violet, "just give my phone number out to any teenage hunk that makes you bat your eyelashes at him. It's _fine_. Nevermind that this is a high-security facility and all communication passed to and fro along it is monitored and meant to be top-secret and classified. No, just give the number to _anyone_ , I _really_ don't mind."

Either Violet couldn't detect the heavy sarcasm in Edna's voice, or she didn't care. "Thanks, Aunt E," she said.

"Oh, dahling, _of course_." Sarcasm showed up again as Edna turned in the doorway to face Violet. "What are aunts _for_?" She rolled her eyes as she closed the door. "I can't tell if you're the exception in your family or if _they_ are," Edna said to Jack-Jack as she skipped down the stairs.

The weekend preceded splendidly. Edna was all for letting the two elder children do whatever the heck they wanted, so long as she had her delightful Jack-Jack all to herself. Oh, the things they accomplished together! He showed off all seventeen of his powers, including little quirks to a few of them that she hadn't noticed before. Upon gathering this additional data, she was able to update the little device she'd created for the Parr family to help him control his powers. "We should come up with a clever name for this little device. Clever names are half the fun of inventing, as you know, dahling," Edna said.

To agree, Jack-Jack duplicated into seventeen Jack-Jacks, all of whom nodded excitedly and cooed.

"Oh, isn't that just _dahling_ ," Edna said. She tiptoed her tiny steps over to the glass candy jar on her high kitchen counter. "That doesn't mean you'll receive seventeen lollipops, you know. You don't need cavities in all six of your teeth."

Jack-Jack decided not to argue with this as he gnawed on the yellow-green swirly lollipop.

Edna replaced the glass jar and said, sighing, "I suppose we must check up on your siblings. It's been quiet here." Her eyes narrowed. "A little _too_ quiet."

Edna was disappointed by what she found. She discovered both kids flopping around Dash's room. Obviously Dash had gotten bored and gone to annoy Violet, but upon finding a victim unwilling to make his annoying game fun, decided monkey see, monkey do. "What are the two children of _supers_ doing lazing around? It's a Friday afternoon! We have an entire weekend!" Edna stomped in there and started shoving shoulders and pummeling heads with pillows. "Get yourselves together! You are young and full of possibilities and potential! You have _super powers_! Even I don't have _that_. Yet look at you!" She pointed accusingly at Dash. "You are full of speed. Go run around the property! Explore! Turn over rocks and run across water and do things that boys your age are supposed to do!"

Dash just groaned and flopped over.

"And _you_!" Edna turned on Violet. Violet barely saw her out of the corner of her eye. "You are sitting around here on a perfectly nice day, waiting for a _boy_! You have his number; _you_ call _him_! You're an independent woman. You've got things to do, _better_ things to do than to wait around for men to come calling. Either you call him, or you say to heck with him and start living your life! If I let the choices of a man dictate my life, if I just sat around home waiting for things to happen, do you think I would become a famous designer who makes world-renown fashion trends? Who clothes _superheroes_? I was all for letting you all do whatever you wanted but I will not stand for this lazy self-pity! I snapped your mother out of it and I'm going to snap you _both_ out of it."

Edna hopped off the bed and both kids' heads raised. "What are you going to do?" Dash wondered.

Edna took Jack-Jack's hand. "I am planning an eventful weekend for us. You can either help me lay out an itinerary, or just do exactly what I say, when I say it." A glint of mischief danced in her big eyes. "It's your choice."

The door closed and Dash eyed his sister. "He could call later, you know," he said, leaping off the bed.

"Maybe he won't," Violet said, sitting up.

Dash gave her this look as he put his hand on the doorknob. "Then call him!" he said, echoing Aunt E.

Violet sat back in the bed, thinking. Was Tony worth it? She looked at the phone and decided that if he really wanted to talk to her, he _would_ call. He just wasn't calling right now. Aunt E had phones all over the house. She could still have fun without waiting for him to do something.

Edna raised an eyebrow as Violet and Dash joined her and Jack-Jack in her stylish kitchen. "Oh, they've emerged," she said, almost to herself.

"All right, Aunt E," Dash said, skedaddling up onto a stool and putting his arms on the counter. "What's the plan?"

Aunt E smiled. "How I'm glad you've asked."

The plan was made (and picked over and commented on and argued about and compromised on, putting the screaming match to rest) and accomplished. Edna had planned to update Jack-Jack's supersuit over the weekend, make him a new wardrobe, and go to a classical music concert with him. What she and him and Violet and Dash ended up doing was way less productive, but way more fun.

They spent Friday night watching old black-and-white movies while eating Chinese takeout ("No vegetables! Aunt E, you're the best!" Dash said, stuffing egg rolls and noodles into his mouth. Aunt E smiled, even as she ate her vegetarian stir-fry). Violet told her what Dash's bedtime was and he ended up abiding by it. They watched three hours of Saturday morning cartoons over healthy cereal with spoonfuls of sugar thrown in there. (Violet gave her brother a look as he scooped in his second bowl of cereal. "Control yourself, Sugar Rush," she said.)

Then, (cartoons over), when Dash presented Edna helplessly with his newest math homework, her quick mind was able to get them in and out of the ordeal in less than twenty minutes, a new record for homework overall for Dash. He let out a low whistle. "And they call _me_ fast," he said, shutting his math book.

Edna shrugged. "Math is math, dahling." She hopped down from her seat. "Methods change but numbers _don't_."

They then spent the rest of the day playing with all of Aunt E's toys. She had motorcycles, scooters, sleek cars, all in a metallic basement under her house. They invaded the intercom system and recorded new commands for the computer. They _all_ kept an eye on the phone, because now Edna and Dash had an invested interest in making sure that Violet wasn't stood up. Edna didn't want the poor girl's heart to break and the only one who got to hurt Dash's sister was Dash!

Right in the middle of their laser gun spy game ('cause Aunt E had the access to the greatest, coolest, newest toys EVER!), the phone rang. Now, the phone had been ringing _all day_ (Bob and Helen were constantly checking in, despite all four of them picking up the phone and reassuring them that they were having a _great_ time), but they all stopped short and stared at phone. "It's him! It's him!" Dash said, hopping up and down as he pulled up his black eye mask.

Violet raced over to the phone. A moment before she'd been pulling out force-fields and shooting her opponents. Now she said, "Hello?" in a calm voice.

Edna could tell from the look on her face that it _was_ Tony this time. "Come," she said, pulling up her own black eye mask and taking both boys by the hand. "Let her be."

"Really, Tony? That's so sweet of you. . ." Violet sat down with a smile as Edna, Dash, and Jack-Jack left her to her Saturday night phone call.

When she finished, she sought out Aunt Edna where she was cuddling a tired Jack-Jack to sleep. "Hey Aunt E?" she asked, tilting her head.

Edna looked up. Violet said quietly, "I guess I _did_ need a babysitter. Thanks for not listening to me."

Edna patted a spot on the sofa next to her. "Anytime, dahling. Anytime."

They didn't want Sunday to end. The kids plunged into Edna's backyard pool and laid out in the sun. Wearing big sunglasses, they all imitated Edna with their reflective metallic sheets as they laid out in lawn chairs poolside.

When Bob and Helen arrived, they made it past security just from face recognition. Their doorbell hits and door knocks yielded nothings, so they headed to the back, only slightly worried when they couldn't find their brood. They were relieved and surprised by the sight awaiting them by Edna's pool.

"Hey guys!" Helen said, offering her arms out for a big hug.

All four heads turned as one. In unison, they pulled down their sunglasses to the tips of their noses. Then the kids exploded into action. "Mom! Dad!" Violet and Dash rushed over to hug their parents. Jack-Jack shrugged and settled back in his chair that was next to his Aunt E. He pushed his sunglasses back and held up his reflective sheet.

"Hi, kids! Oh, it's so great to see you! I missed you so much!" Helen said amongst the hugs and kisses.

"How was your trip?" Violet wondered as Dash yelled, "Did you defeat more bad guys?! Wait, did you guys save the world without us?!"

"No, we did not. We'd never do that! It was more of a PR trip," Bob said, giving his son a noogie.

"What's PR?" Dash wanted to know.

"Public relations," his older sister informed him.

"Whatever. Sounds _boring_ ," Dash said. Then he perked up. "But guess what _we_ did over the weekend?!" He stumbled over his words, his hands gesticulating as his tongue ran as fast as his legs.

Bob wandered over to Edna and Jack-Jack as Helen listened intently to Dash and Violet's comments. He scooped up Jack-Jack and rubbed cheeks with him. Jack-Jack cooed, excited to be back with his family. "So, you were okay with all three kids for the weekend?" Bob asked her.

Edna lowered her sunglasses and waved a hand. "Of course, dahling. I did it _properly_. I had _zero_ problems."

Bob counted off his fingers. "Dash got his homework done?"

"Yes," Edna said.

"Violet got her much-anticipated phone call with Tony Rydinger?"

Edna rolled her eyes. " _Did_ she."

"And Jack-Jack didn't destroy the house?"

"Unless that it is just a video projection behind us, you know that that is a stupid question," Edna said.

Bob smiled. "Thanks, E. I really appreciate it."

"It was no problem, Robert," Edna said. "Just promise me one thing."

"Sure, E. Anything."

"While I had a delightful time with all _three_ of your offspring, Robert," Edna said, fixing him with a look, "don't _ever_ do that to me again."

Bob nodded. "Understood."

Edna smiled. "Good." What she wouldn't say was just how much fun it was hanging out with those three kids. They made her feel young, more spontaneous. And despite whatever she might dismissively say when the goodbyes came, she'd welcome them back again—all three of them—anytime.

 **Edna's a big ol' sucker for kids, LOL. I also may have been referencing Sound of Music with Violet not needing a babysitter. XD**

 **(On a side-note, yesterday marks my 9th anniversary on this site. Time flies!)** **Thanks for reading! Review?**


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